It’s another beautiful Monday, and I love Mondays. Today I am reminded of the importance of words, especially soft words in the face of a conflicting situation or argument. Over the weekend I had a rather harsh session with my teenage boy, and out of my anger and frustration, I said a word I shouldn’t have said at all.
Immediately I became very remorseful, and almost at the point of being very hard on me. for the life of me, i wouldn’t have imagined myself referring to someone with that word let alone my son, but I did, and didn’t find it funny.
Though I apologised to him immediately, for a while I still felt beat down, here I am always telling him and his younger brother to be mindful of the words that say to each other and to their peers as well, I am the same person violating the command… A case of practice what you preach!
I felt like I had failed them by saying that word, but afterwards I had to juggle myself out of the thought, because I knew if I continue to linger in that remorseful state , the enemy might want to take advantage and actually make a big deal out of it, if you know what I mean.
There was more to me just saying the word, it came as a result of the state of my heart , over time I had allowed my anger to take root, and not exercise self control with respect to my parenting skill, and if you are like me, with 3 boys to deal with, sometimes you don’t even remember anything called self-control. when it comes to discipline and leading them aright. I guess Mom is still a working progress afterall, and the fact that i am mommy does not mean I am super -holy, far from it.
Despite the fact that the power of life and death lies in the tongue, as we have seen from scriptures, it takes the grace of God and a deliberate consciousness to be slow to speak in the world we find ourselves today, therefore we must at all times be mindful of the words we speak especially to our growing Children . if you cant keep your cool in dealing with them, neither will they, especially when they are attaining that age of accountability and taking responsibilities for their thoughts and action.
Having appropriate control and response to our emotion is a lifelong human challenge, not just for teenagers or children alone. Therefore it is important to always go to God and His word in order to respond appropriately per time and by discernment, so when I was having my time alone with Him this morning while looking at the perfect law of liberty I knew that He was lovingly reproving me for my outburst the other day.
There is no relationship that will not have issues at what point or another, but one of the strongests weapon for managing the relationship and people skill is knowing how to communicate effectively to minimise outbursts, anger, wrath and all the in betweens, even in parenting too. I realized that my apology to the young Man immediately I uttered that word to him, and my remorse showed him something about His MOM, that made him to come back to hug me, saying, “Mom, I’m sorry I made you angry in the first place”.
I was also sorry for not being able to control myself too, may be if i was a little bit gentle , the response would have been different. But I know better now, that a gentle answer turns away wratrh, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Lord help me to be control my emotions in the face of an imminent outburst. Teach me to be slow to speak and slow to wrath. Help me to a good model of a self control woman to my immediate environment.
So help me God!