Lately, I have recognised that there is a void!
I have found out that when I go off, for long, encumbered with the cares of life, without really touching base with God in real communion, I get to a point where everything begins to choke out the life of me. You see it is very easy to get clustered up in activities going through the motion day in, day out without realising that nurturing your one-on-one union with the Father – is the real essence of life.
I have also discovered a pattern, it is the fact that when I fall sick, and I seldom do, it is an indication that something is amiss, which is my fellowship with God through the Holy Spirit.I am not trying to be seen as “spiritual” or “holier than thou”, it’s just that I am gradually becoming comfortable letting the ink bleed on paper concerning the different aspect of my life, so by writing about me, the good, the bad, the in-between I am coming to terms with me and my fears, doubts,beliefs and by that I can mirror same for someone out there who is reading this.
The desire to spend quality time in prayer has given way to worry and despondency, and it seems the weight of the whole is on my shoulder. In the last few days that I have had to shut out myself to rest awhile, In resting and struggling to study the scriptures, I have found solace in just whispering my heartsong to God to get back in sync with my communications with him.
Early yesterday morning as I was getting the baby ready for the day, I started a conversation with God, it wasn’t the usual “Christianese conversation where we quote all the bible verses. as if God does not know His word. I was just pouring my heart out to the lover of my soul, the One who loves me regardless. I saw the look on my 7month old baby, as he watched my gesticulations, I think he sensed what was going on at that point in time. after a few moments of up-close-and-personal, no- holds- barred conversation I felt this peace and satisfaction.
It was as if I heard Him say, “this is the kind of conversation I want to have with you girl, where you are just you, with no cloak on, no pretence. No wish list, do this, do that, I want this, I want that. Then I realised yet again,
An act of letting go, not a wish list, because God already knows what your needs are. He knows your name, He sees your fears, He knows that which keeps you up late at night, and what startles you early in the morning.
It is an outpouring, an outflow of the innate desire to be close to God. Like the Bethel Music song, which goes like this- Just to close to you, just to walk next to you, this is my one thing, Lord you are my one thing.
It takes the burden of life off our tiny shoulders and put it on His much bigger shoulders- Remember the songwriter say, if He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders, I know my brother/sister that He will carry you.
Everyone Prays, I know that! And I’m not here to debate about religion either. My point of view is that Prayer is not and should not be because of religion which is the opium of men to an “unknown god”
But a lifestyle born out of a relationship with the Father of Life through His Son Jesus, a lifestyle that is empowered by the Holy Spirit.
Do you know the Father? Do you have a relationship with Him through His Only-begotten, Son Jesus Christ?
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